In My Head

852110236_13448670704630895532.jpgThe past three months have gone by pretty quickly and I love how it is already April. I did spend quite a lot of the time being in my head trying to figure things out. As much as I try to keep my sensitive and insecure moments to a minimum, sometimes I just cannot help myself.

But before I get to writing about those deeper moments – which are mostly in camp – I will start with the highlights from the weekends – when I am out of camp.

In February, I attended Jamie’s play, An Absolute Turkey and in March, Shaf’s play, The Illusionist. Now, I have told the both of them this – if our lives were a reality show, the ‘competition’ between the both of them over whose play is better would have been a driving force for drama the entire season. HAHA.

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Post-Show Happiness Pt. 1

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Post-Show Happiness Pt. 2

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Post-Show Happiness Pt. 3

But no, in all seriousness, it was fun supporting the both of them. I feel like they both stepped out of their comfort zones – in different ways – and it made me proud, sitting there in the audience, watching them and being there with a flower or candy bouquet after the show. I hope to see them in action again soon.

The All In! Young Writers’ Festival was held in March too. I only attended one screening of a few short films including, I Love You More, a short film that I was involved in producing as part of a group project for a filmmaking module over a year ago.

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Forgot to mention that they were both late.

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But it’s okay, I forgive ya’ll.

It was nice that this project brought me, Dalene and Minyi back together a year later. (The other group members, Rachel, Sherlyn and Chels couldn’t make it.) I held off from re-watching the short film leading up to the screening because I thought that seeing it again after a long time during the screening would make it more ‘special.’ After the screening, we had lunch where we gave each other life updates and rehashed certain things that happened back during our three years in Poly. We also did some window shopping so it was some simple fun.

Later in March, I also attended a secondary school reunion with Azfar, Rosydi and Gina. It was hosted at one of our schoolmate’s house. Although I really appreciated the invite, I was hesitant and reluctant to attend from the get go. Secondary school just does not bring back the best of memories for me – I did not really fit in and back then it was quite a struggle. So it was a last minute decision to attend.

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I think it has been close to two years since the four of us were last together?

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I hope not another two years go by before we’re together again. *Glares at Gina*

Rosydi and Azfar could totally see how nervous I was on the bus to the reunion. And honestly, I would not have attended the reunion if they were not attending with me. I think it was just the uncertainty as to who was going to be there and how they were going to act that made me nervous. I knew Gina would be there too and since she has not been the easiest person to meet up with, seeing her there – though she showed up two hours late – was an added bonus.

The three of them were able to interact with these people that we had not seen in forever pretty easily but for me, it was awkward. Of course there was the typical army talk with the guys but none of the girls I used to be close to were there. (I believe that the invitations did not reach everyone… Oops.)

I also feel like I have evolved from who I used to be back in secondary school and so these people who did not really know me on a deeper level back then – to begin with – did not have much to say to me and likewise I did not have much to say to most of them either. After all, I was quite the wallflower for a bulk of those four years.

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At least I won’t have to worry about FOMO now.

I cannot really say that I regret attending but at the same time, I cannot say I am glad I attended either.

And last night, I attended Fifth Harmony’s 7/27 Tour concert after buying the tickets way back in January. I was lucky that Khairul – a friend that I made during the two month Signals course after BMT – was willing to go with me.

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Gotta thank the concert buddy for groovin’ along.

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April may have only just started but this concert is most definitely a highlight. I found myself letting loose as I sang and danced my heart out. It was totally worth the wait and money and the girls were gorgeous! I felt really happy when Normani noticed and reciprocated my wave. If life was a reality show, attending this concert would have made for a perfect season finale.

In between all these key events, I think I have been doing an okay job at balancing my weekends with meet-ups and ‘me’ time. I think there was only one weekend where I contemplated between going out and staying home but I decided to go out anyway.

Life in camp has been generally alright. I tend to forget how lucky I am to have ended up in this camp and unit, in terms of workload and location. But finding my place and people, is still an issue.

A new batch of about 20 Signallers came in a month ago – a larger amount than expected. I took a genuine interest in getting to know most of them because we would have to decide who to keep with us after a two week ‘orientation’ programme – the rest would be posted out to different ‘departments’ within our unit. And since I would be working with whoever stays until next May when I leave, it was an important decision too.

We kept about a third of them. It was exciting having new people around. They were people who were easy to talk to and did work. But when you look at the big picture, the newbies did not exactly shake up the office dynamics like I had hoped.

For a start, I still feel like I lack a true confidante and ally in camp. You know, that one person that I can complain and vent to without worrying about what I said being repeated. And also the kind of person that I can make eye contact with and smile when something happens in the office because we both know that we are thinking the same thing.

I miss having that kind of connection with someone.

So I end up bottling things up in camp. Occasionally, I do let things slip because I can only hold so much in. But then I question if I should have said anything at all because I get asked if I have ‘anger issues’ or am told that I am ‘oversensitive.’

Do not get me wrong. I am still able to be myself in camp. I disturb and annoy almost everyone around me. And this is an indication that I have reached a certain level of comfort around these people. But there are different layers to every relationship and with these people, it is most definitely on the surface.

It doesn’t help that they do not really get me. I am a lot of things but these people know me best to be ‘annoying.’ I can own that but it does get exhausting when that seems to be the only word people associate you with – even if lightheartedly.

For now, there are only about two to three individuals in camp who I ‘trust.’ It being really easy to rub me the wrong way could be one reason for this low number. But I guess, there just is not that much in common to forge strong bonds over. And with everyone on their phones most of the time, there is barely any attempt at conversation to find common topics either.

Sure, they bond over playing the same mobile games. And so it would be a lot easier if I just downloaded this game and played along. But I told myself back in secondary school that I was not going to change just to fit in and I still want to keep that promise to myself. Call me stubborn or difficult but I am not going to do something that I would not normally do just to get by.

There are also other things that have happened or been said that got the wheels in my head turning. But at the end of the day, I know I can’t let what people think, say or do affect my spirit. It is just hard to remember at times especially when there is no one in your environment to remind you of that.

So I am going to try to care less and not add up the nothings into something. I know it is not going to be easy and I will probably be in my head again by the end of the week – after all, it does keep me occupied. But I will be working on it. Whatever happens, happens.

Fifth Harmony sang in their song, ‘Brave Honest Beautiful’:

“Don’t go and waste your precious time with all that nonsense on your mind.”

And this reminder is why I feel like the Fifth Harmony concert is a perfect finale.

Until next time,

PEACE OUT.

The Dreaded Next Chapter Pt. 2

I’ve told you everything you need to know about my internship. And you already know about some of the post-internship decisions I had to make. So this post is more about the things that are going to happen – whether I like it or not – before the current chapter closes and the next one begins.

Picking up from where I left off, I started tearing when I read the date on my enlistment letter because I was feeling a mix of fear and sadness. I was afraid of the unknown. And I was also upset that I had just two months before everything changed for two whole years. I revealed the news to some friends and I also told my Dad about it. However, it was the chat I had with my older brother that night that gave me a renewed confidence that I will be just fine. My brother basically answered any question I had, based on his experience. He told me to break up the two years into smaller portions and that made me realise that for now, all I need to worry about is the first two weeks of confinement because after that, at least I should be able to head home every weekend – unless there’s a twist.

I’ve been trying to prepare myself mentally and physically but it hasn’t exactly been easy. I feel conflicted between spending the two months working out as opposed to lazing around while I can. So far, I would like to think I’ve been doing an alright job at balancing both. And I hope that keeping that up or doing better will make me feel more confident and comfortable in the days leading up to my enlistment.

I’ve always known that it’s not going to be easy and that’s why I’ve been dreading it. I mean I’ve never been the fittest and it’s going to be tough keeping my emotions in check. But I do look forward to seeing myself change for the better throughout the next two years. I just hope that I don’t lose what my friends call, a ‘killer’ smile in the process.

“I’m stronger than you think and tougher than I know.”

The next thing that is going to happen whether I like it or not is graduation. And before the graduation ceremony was the graduation show – DTVM Awards – which literally happened two days ago. It’s a tradition for every class to put up a performance at the DTVM Awards. In Year 1, my class put on a skit. In Year 2, we hosted a game. And now, in Year 3, we filmed a music video parody. Although, I was initially against the idea of filming a music video because of the amount of time and energy we would have to invest into it, I’m glad we ended up pulling through. Because looking back, it wasn’t just a music video that we created, it was memories too. I can’t wait for us to look back at both the music video and blooper reel in years to come and cry and laugh in equal measure.

“If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that’s a full day. That’s a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you’re going to have something special.”

– Jim Valvano

It was during the process of filming the music video that I started to wonder how anything else that is to come can possibly top the people I’ve met and the experiences I’ve had over the past three years. I’ve laughed, I’ve thought and I’ve cried over the past three years enough to feel complete. And I definitely feel like DTVM is something special that I will always have with me.

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The cast of the music video in our #Kidzania outfits. (Missing Shantel, Sam and Eunice)

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#ThugLife selfie.

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#Flannel selfie.

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#BusinessFormal selfie.

I was expecting to cry during the video montage of the past three years, at the DTVM Awards but it was taking a step back and looking at the bigger picture that got me emotional.

“And yes, I know we all love each other but the fact is the glue that holds high school friendships together is high school. Being around each other everyday, seeing each other in the halls, whenever something is up we don’t have to do any work to talk to our friends about it; they’re right there. As soon as it takes effort, we get lazy and then we forget and then we just move on. I don’t want to fade away.”

– Tina Cohen Chang (Glee)

The recycled quote above sums up my sentiments perfectly. Over the three years, we have all found our immediate circle of friends. And I’m sure we’ll all do a great job at keeping in touch with the people within that immediate circle. What saddens me is the thought that we won’t make the same effort to keep in touch with the people outside that circle who we still consider our friends.

I know we went six months without seeing each other everyday during our internships. And that little gathering we had in the middle for Christmas felt special, for that reason. And now every time we see each other, it doesn’t really feel like anything has changed other than time having passed by and us knowing that graduation is approaching. All I’m hoping for is that we try to keep the bond that we now share even if we get busy and even if it isn’t as convenient as it once used to be and even if we have new friends to fill that void.

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I want to walk down a real red carpet with these people.

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The #ILoveYouMore Team.

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The #WeAreTheMob Team.

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With Shaf, Chels and Jamie. (I hope the official photos turned out better.)

I want to be there in the future, to hear about the new TV show they’re developing or about the cover story of their magazine or about a event I can attend to show my support. I know it will take some time for all of us to get there given that we will have to spend three to four years in University or three to four years climbing up that hierarchy in this industry but I know we’ll get there.

I still have some time before my enlistment and I’m sure I’m bound to feel nervous the closer I get to it. There are a couple of tiny things I wish to accomplish before I enlist. I will try my best to use my time productively while still allocating time for lazing around and doing nothing. It’s going to be just fine. I’ll be just fine.

“The best use of imagination is creativity. The worst use of imagination is anxiety.”

– Deepak Chopra

Until next time,

PEACE OUT.

 

The Dreaded Next Chapter Pt. 1

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Since I last wrote a blog post, my internship ended, I contemplated extending my stay at my internship company, figured out university applications, received my National Service enlistment letter and participated in my final production as a DTVM student.

Let’s go in chronological order, starting with the end of my internship.

The last few weeks of my internship wasn’t any different than before. I still had transcriptions to complete and documents to scan for the main project I was attached to but the to-do list was getting shorter and shorter as my final week was approaching.

On days where I was not needed at the office, I was needed to help out on shoot for another project. I must say that I am glad I got the chance to work on both projects. It allowed me to compare certain aspects of TV production as the size of the crew and my job scope for each project was slightly different. But of course, on my final few days, the things I had to complete for both projects came to a head. There was so many things to settle and I thought back to what one of my friendly colleagues told me.

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A selfie taken after the shoot with friendly production crew members.

“People like us will never have an easy last day. We’re too responsible.”

I didn’t believe her at the time but it turned out to be true. I don’t mean to flatter myself but I have to give myself some credit for always providing a certain quality to the work that I am tasked with. So it took longer than expected but eventually I managed to complete everything.

With that being said, I have to thank the friendly colleagues who made my 22-week internship easier. They treated me like one of their own and made me feel so much more comfortable at work. During my final week, they treated me to a farewell meal and in return, I wrote them cards as my humble way of thanking them for everything. I owe them a lot more than just cards and I hope that I will be able to give back to them somehow, some way, in the future.

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Here are the friendly colleagues who made my time so much easier.

As cliche as it may sound, I definitely feel like I have grown from the internship experience . It was not easy having to adapt to the ‘real world.’ I even felt uncomfortable and uneasy at times. But like The Biggest Loser host, Bob Harper, said, “I think that growth happens when you are at your most uncomfortable.”

Now, before I could close this internship chapter for good, I was presented with an offer to prolong the chapter – at the very least – until the end of May. I considered the offer because the project was something I thought I would enjoy working on. I discussed it with family, friends and colleagues and ultimately chose to do what I felt was best for me – taking the break that I have earned.

I have been looking forward to this break forever and I would be sabotaging myself by committing to another three months of work with only a two week break in-between the end of my internship and the start of the new project.

I felt good about my decision for about 36 hours into my break until I noticed everyone around me either working or extending their internship or knowing exactly what their next step was going to be. It made me start looking for something too. I estimated my enlistment date to fall in August and that meant I would have at least a six-month break. I could see myself chilling at home for about two to three months but finding a job after that would leave me yet another small window to rest before enlisting. Eventually I just told myself to take a chill pill and surprisingly, this was one of the times I actually listened to myself. And I am so glad I did as it turns out I am not enlisting in August. (More on that later.)

Starting my internship two weeks earlier than everyone else meant I finished my internship two weeks earlier. I think these two weeks were crucial for me to figure out my university applications. One of my closest friends from secondary school, Azfar, has been urging me to think about it forever but I always put it off. Thereby, these two weeks came in handy for me to figure it out and actually complete the application process – which was pretty tedious. I ended up applying for NUS’s Faculty of Arts and Social Sciences (FASS) as well as NTU’s Communication Studies as my top choices.

I attended the NTU Open House hoping to be excited by the prospects of studying there (just like when I attended the SP Open House) but it turned out to be pretty dull. After sitting through three talks, I didn’t even want to attend the NUS Open House, the following weekend. As of right now, I am still leaning towards NTU but there is one important factor to consider and I’ll worry about it when the time comes. (Oh and thanks Azfar for helping me out when I was bugging you to help me check everything. I really appreciate it!)

Now, moving on to National Service. I was out with Chelsea and Shafna after watching Zootopia when I received a text from Rosydi about how he received his enlistment letter. When I found out that he was enlisting in May, the wheels in my head started turning. I couldn’t wait to return home to check my letter box, just so I could clear any anxiety I had about my enlistment. Ideally, I would open the letter box to nothing that was addressed to me but of course, when I checked my letter box, there it was.

I still had a little hope. My enlistment date could still be much later than May, right? So I dashed to my room and slowly opened the letter to find out I was enlisting on May 18 2016.

It wasn’t long before tears started streaming down my face.

(I’m ending this instalment of “The Dreaded Next Chapter” here because I’ve gone beyond 1000 words and this is Minutes with Aravind not Hours with Aravind. But I think I ended it at a pretty dramatic cliffhanger, eh?)

Until next time,

PEACE OUT.

“I think life is just a big con.”

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“One day, Sabine just said to Hector, ‘I think life is just a big con.’

Startled, Hector asked, ‘What do you mean?’ (That was what he always said when he hadn’t been listening properly the first time.)

‘Well, you’re born, and straight away you have to rush about, go to school, and then work, have children, and then your parents die and then before you know it you get old and die too.'”

–    Hector Finds Time by François Lelord

It is important to me, for me to have time to do the things I love and enjoy even when I am ‘not supposed to’ have the time. These things include spending time with friends and family, getting my daily dose of reality TV and sitcoms, reading and sometimes even lying around doing nothing.

I understand that time is not one of the luxuries of life but it saddens me that we all have a whole bunch of things to do that we keep jumping from one thing to the next as the list keeps piling on and on. I guess, I have always been aware of how fast time is passing by but this book that I started reading recently, the past few months and the thought of the uncertain future have just given me a whole lot more to think about. That is why I decided that it is finally time to write a blog post to sort of help clear my mind.

It has been nine weeks since my internship at a production company started and after a slow start, the past few weeks have been passing by pretty quickly. I think week nine is the most comfortable I have felt at work – thanks to some friendly colleagues. But what I am trying to point out is that it took me nine weeks to adapt to this new environment and before I know it, there is going to be another change in environment and I am totally unprepared for the next change.

I have had my fair share of ups and downs the past nine weeks. There were times when I was extra anxious when tasked with something new or when I realised I had messed up. I was trying so hard not to make mistakes that I failed to realise that this is the time for me to make mistakes and learn from them. I would call that ‘revelation’ a turning point as I have been feeling less anxious ever since. (Keyword: less)

As uncomfortable as I feel at times, I give myself credit for going out of my comfort zone. I might complain and disagree with how certain things are done but I am learning from the experience. I mean, I do need to find something to write about in my logbook and surprisingly this requirement has been helping me filter out lessons that I have learnt each week.

“I am in the TV industry but I have no time to watch TV.”

The above quote was something a colleague said in a casual conversation. At first, I did not make much of it but soon enough, it got the wheels in my head turning. It made me wonder if this is really what I want to do. I know… I know… this is such a cliche thought at this point which is exactly why I am not too worried about ‘the future’. My plan is just to see how the rest of my internship goes, talk to people, get their opinion and do some research myself to help me figure things out. (If you’re reading this and you can relate, then let me just tell you that I am sure we will find our place and solve the puzzle eventually. No rush.)

Don’t get me wrong, I knew what I was signing up for when I picked ‘production’ for my internship – ‘long hours, no sleep and constant work’. I am aware that the way I work may not be ideal for me to be interning at a production company but I just believed and I still believe that there are more ways than one to get things done. However, being at the bottom of the hierarchy, I totally understand that I can’t have things my way. So, at the end of the day, if this is really what I want to do, I promise you that I will put in the work and slowly but surely climb up that damn ladder.

“My fear of heights won’t stop me from climbing the ladder of success.”

Until next time,

PEACE OUT.

Here’s What You Missed Pt. 2

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Let me go straight into this post.

The evening before Day 1 in Ipoh, I was charging my phone with my laptop when iTunes told me there was some syncing error. I don’t even remember what I was trying to sync… If anything at all. It told me to format my phone and I was hesitant to do so. I tried restarting my phone but it still couldn’t sync so I was left with no choice when I decided to format it not realising that my last back up was a month ago. When my phone was done formatting, I lost one month worth of texts and photos. It felt like I time traveled a month back. I feel a little stupid for formatting it especially since I don’t think I was trying to sync anything in the first place. iTunes just popped up when I plugged in my phone and for some reason I decided to listen to it when it told me to format my phone. Sigh…

Anyway, let’s move on to Ipoh. I was nervous for the trip. I have mentioned in previous posts that I am not a fan of camps. But after the briefing I realised that this wasn’t really a camp. We were sleeping in hotels and we were going on the trip with people we already knew. It was more of a work trip. We just had to find someone interesting to film a short documentary about in two days and that was what I should be worrying about – not the living arrangements.

I had a good team. I was pretty confident we could get things done as long as we stayed focus. My main worry was that we might lose our patience with each other when things were going wrong. I also felt some pressure having to be the ‘team leader’ which is another way of saying that I was responsible for anything that went wrong. By the time we were all at the airport, my nerves were gone and I was more excited than anything.

Day 1 in Ipoh was tiring. My team split up into three groups and walked around talking to people, hoping to find someone interesting or someone that could lead us to someone interesting. I was with Jeremiah and we didn’t have much luck. However, the other two groups each found someone that could be a potential profile: a man that sells sugarcane juice and an elderly woman who owns a small snack shop. We also learned that there was a dangerous area near where the sugarcane man lived that we should avoid. We ended our day leaning towards choosing the sugarcane man as our profile but we wanted to find out more about both profiles.

This is one of my favourite pictures. I'm getting good at this selfie thing, eh?

This is one of my favourite pictures. I’m getting good at this selfie thing, eh?

This is us waiting for lunch.

This is us waiting for lunch.

Day 2 was a little demoralising. We were supposed to start filming but there was still a lot that was unconfirmed and a lot of information we had not received yet. We split up into two and then three. And we learnt that both our potential profiles were living at the same row of blocks. So, we thought maybe we could focus on the location instead of their individual stories. We spent the rest of the day after lunch, filming both potential profiles and trying to dig up as much information as possible. By the time my half of the group returned to the hotel, I was pretty down. I felt we hadn’t made much progress and I felt pressure to make things work especially as the ‘team leader’. However, while using my phone, I found a quote that I took down from Lauren Conrad’s Infamous and it made me feel a little better.

“Do not feel pressure. Pressure is for when you have to do something you aren’t prepared to do. But you are prepared for this. Now let’s kick some butt, all right?”

– Todd Barrows (Infamous, Fame Game Series)

As I returned to my group for dinner, I felt more positive and I knew we had to find a way to make it work. Our shoot script was due tomorrow morning which meant we needed to figure out what exactly our story was and what we were going to film. We decided on going ahead with the snack shop lady as our profile but we were struggling to come up with sequences to film. We were up ’til 12 trying to get out shoot script done and so were the other groups. I was feeling sleepy as we reached the end of our script but I was happy with the end product. Once we checked everything, I left and I believe only Vera and Siti were double checking the script and thinking of some extra shots we could film the next day. Things seemed to be looking up, huh?

I think this was taken on Night 2.

I think this was taken on Night 2.

Day 3 in Ipoh was pretty fun. I forgot to mention that the snack shop lady lives right next to the dangerous area we were told to avoid on Day 1. And we needed to film her at home. So, Ms Mary helped us rent a car and driver to drive us down there and it was pretty thrilling. I stayed in the car for the most part because I wouldn’t have anything to do if I was standing around outside anyway. The rest of the day was filled with us filming everything we needed and by the end of it, we were pretty satisfied with how everything worked out. There was a sort of a bonding activity on Night 3 for everyone regardless of group and class. I was expecting to cry based on stories I’ve heard but it turned out to be more funny than emotional.

Rushing to get the shot.

Rushing to get the shot.

Filming interviews on Day 3.

Filming interviews on Day 3.

Here's a picture that we took with our profile.

Here’s a picture that we took with our profile.

Day 4 was the last day and that alone made it a good day because I couldn’t wait to get home. It was very chill. We performed a skit for some primary school students, toured a resort and had a great lunch there. And soon we were off to the airport, on the plane and back in Singapore. I really appreciate all the effort that the lecturers put into organising the trip and taking care of us. We have the best lecturers at DTVM, I swear. However, I was and I still am very glad that this trip is over. Now, my team and I just have to put the pieces together in the editing room and hope that the end product is everything we wanted it to be. It’s not going to be easy but we’ll get there.

Messy table but good food and company.

Messy table but good food and company.

Love this picture and love these people.

Love this picture and love these people.

The A-Team on Day 4.

The A-Team on Day 4. I’m really proud of us.

I spent the weekend back from Ipoh catching up on my shows and also writing memory bag letters for my friends. The memory bag was introduced on Night 3 in Ipoh. It’s basically a bag that you receive right before internship. When you’re feeling low, you open the bag and read the letters to make you feel better. So, I used the letters to remind people of how great they really are while at the same time giving a little piece of advice. Hopefully, my letters will put a smile on their face when read. And I hope I received some good letters too.

A picture from my letter writing workshop.

A picture from my letter writing workshop.

Now, let’s see what else I have been up to. Last Wednesday, I spent with a few people from Rojakrew. I wish everyone could make it but we still had fun so I guess that’s good enough. It was a pretty fun day because we bowled, we played pool, we played Kinect and we walked around Toys ‘R’ Us. Fulfilling for me at least. Last Friday, I watched Jurassic World with the girls. It had a easy storyline to follow so I appreciated that cause I didn’t have to think much and I didn’t want to either. I got a haircut and re-highlighted my hair. I love how it looks now. Yay me! I just realised I haven’t taken a selfie since. Yesterday, Chels and I went to HMV where XZ is working. I have always loved HMV. The environment where you are surrounded by thousands of albums and movies is just perfect. And to make things even more perfect, I was haunted by MIKA’s latest album, in a good way. I saw his album at four different locations in the same store. And about 15 minutes after we walked in, the entire album started playing too. So, I decided to stay ’til the album ended. I found a couple of seemingly interesting movies to check out in the meantime.

Inspired by SEA Games athletes, Jamie came in wanting to win but she didn't.

Inspired by SEA Games athletes, Jamie came in wanting to win but she didn’t.

Jamie did pretty well riding the boat though. She's a natural.

Jamie did pretty well riding the boat though. She’s a natural.

Watched Jurassic World with these people.

Watched Jurassic World with these people.

Shaf left early but I still wanted a selfie at the spot with great lighting.

Shaf left early but I still wanted a selfie at the spot with great lighting.

After one week of my holidays was spent in Ipoh, I had two weeks left. And now it’s already the Friday before school reopens and I’m left with just the weekend. I was hoping to spend the bulk of my holidays at home, watching shows and chilling but obviously that’s now how it turned out. There were group meetings every other day and a lot of time was spent on assignments and not at home. I’ve honestly come to appreciate my stay-home days. It’s a little tough accepting the fact that I don’t get as many off-days anymore but I do know that it’s only going to get tougher over the next eight weeks. However, we’ve already completed five assignments in the first term and we’re left with just another ten. Fingers crossed that I don’t go crazy over the next eight weeks.

PEACE OUT.

We’ll see…

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The first week of the third year of school has started. And I do have quite a bit to write about. But before I can get to that, I need to recap the last three weeks of the school holidays. It just feels better to go in chronological order. However, I might have forgotten certain mention-worthy bits because it has been a while. So, what you read might just be a condensed recap.

Most of the fourth week was burnt at the CASS Freshmen Orientation Camp. I was involved in the camp as part of the Day Programmes team. I was not really looking forward to it because I’m not a fan of camps in general. However, that is also the reason why I feel a sense of accomplishment whenever I go through these camps. It’s a step towards ‘going out of my comfort zone’.

The camp was fun and it turned out better than expected. It was nice meeting the freshmen and getting to know my schoolmates better too. Of course, it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows. It was tiring and some things didn’t work out like we had all hoped it would. For instance, my team had to improvise all our games because it rained on all three days. There were other interesting things that happened too. (Things that I rather not mention here but would love to share with you in person.) But I guess what is important is that, by the end of the camp, there was a strong and special bond that was formed amongst the members of the organising committee. And that’s just nice.

The rest of the week, I didn’t do much. I needed to catch up on my sleep and TV shows.

Here's my Day Progs team!  (From left to right: Q, Joel, Me, Jasmin & Elisa)

Here’s my Day Progs team! We all contributed something different to the team. Wouldn’t have had it any other way.

A selfie with our night walk makeup on.

A selfie with our night walk scarers makeup on.

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Part of the Organising Committee.

The highlights of the fifth week have to be going to Universal Studios Singapore with Rosydi & Azfar and cafe-hopping with Chelsea, Jamie & Shafna. Let me tell you about USS first.

A month or two ago, Azfar told Rosydi and I that if he does really well for his A’Level exams, he would treat us to something. Back then, we had quite a number of ideas but the idea that we all agreed on was USS. My point is that, Azfar scored well and kept his word and I got to go to USS for free!

Although it was my second time there, I was even more anxious than the first time. I have got a fear of heights and almost every single ride had some sort up and (out-of-nowhere) down motion. After the The Mummy ride, I thought I was done for the day. But we took a break and I am proud to say that I did not back out of any ride. Of course it was just perfect, that riding the Battlestar Galactica roller coasters were not an option because it was out of order. So, I didn’t have to worry about that.

A summary of our time at USS would be us trying out the many rides and walking around taking pictures. Later that day, we also watched Fast & Furious 7. The ending scene was still very emotional despite the spoilers on social media. I feel sad whenever I listen to ‘See You Again’ but it’s catchy and addictive.

It's Vin Diesel. When we took this picture, we had no intentions of watching #Fast7.

It’s Vin Diesel! When we took this picture, we had no intentions of watching #Fast7.

Similar to the caption above. Funny how we ended up watching it for real later that day.

Similar to the caption above. Funny how we ended up watching it for real later that day.

How can you not love this picture?

How can you not love this picture? 

Thanks Azfar for the treat and thanks guys for the fun time!

Thanks Azfar for the treat and thanks guys for the fun time!

Next, cafe-hopping! We planned this just the week before when we were cooking at Jamie’s. We visited just three cafes – ChoupinetteWheeler’s Yard and FATCAT Ice Cream Bar. I’m not going to do a food review because I only have three levels when it comes to judging food – Okay, Good and Great. Most things fall in the ‘Good’ category and I’m happy with that!

We also took many pictures of ourselves and the food we ate. To summarise, it was good food and great company.

The Waffles at FATCAT were great.

The Waffles at FATCAT were great.

FATCAT's Original Waffle topped with a scoop of Cookies & Cream Ice Cream.

FATCAT’s Original Waffle topped with a scoop of Cookies & Cream Ice Cream.

This Chocolate Fudge cake from Wheeler's Yard was okay.

This Chocolate Fudge cake from Wheeler’s Yard was okay.

Brunch at Choupinette was great.

Brunch at Choupinette was great.

I really love this picture. #Perfection.

I really love this picture. #Perfection.

Moving on to week six, it was the Freshmen Orientation Programme also known as the last event the current CASS Club was involved in for now. Unlike the Orientation Camp, the Orientation Programme was compulsory. The CASS Club didn’t have that much to do. We were only involved in the first two days.

I couldn’t make it on the first day because I had to attend a compulsory ‘Grooming and Dining Etiquette Workshop’ in school. It was one of the workshops from week one that got pushed back due to lack of sign ups. The workshop was okay. I did learn something but I don’t know if I will remember everything when it matters the most. On the bright side, me completing this workshop means that all the compulsory workshops are out of the way!

On the second day of the orientation, we helped out with the campus tour. I was stationed at the writers’ room. However, the seniors were using it to rehearse for an important pitch. So, I tried to keep the freshmen outside after the first few rounds. After the campus tour, the CASS Club Main Committee took a couple of pictures together and that was that.

We had a checkered/flannel dress code.

We had a checkered/flannel dress code.

Thanks for the fun and not-so-fun times! I would do it all over again.

Thanks for the fun and not-so-fun times guys! I would do it all over again.

I was hoping to spend the rest of the week at home but on Wednesday and Friday, I went to school for Rojakrew meetings. The Rojakrew comprises of a few seniors, Chelsea, Jamie & Shafna. We have been working on a documentary the entire holiday and we officially released (or uploaded it on Facebook) on that Friday. In between the Rojakrew meetings, on Thursday, I spent the day in JB with Rosydi & Azfar. It was nice being away from social media.

After we uploaded the video, we just hung out at Hilltop Haven.

After we uploaded the video, we just hung out at Hilltop Haven. Here is half of Rojakrew! 

We played Monopoly Deal ( which has got to be one of my favourite card games ever!). I won just once.

We played Monopoly Deal ( which has got to be one of my favourite card games ever!). I won just once.

Later, we met Kirt for Dinner.

Later, we met Kirt for Dinner. She is now one of us!

I must say, it was a pretty nice way to end the holidays.

Now, four days of school have passed and I do have a couple of things on my mind. A couple of things I wish I could get off my chest. Things I have blogged about before. Things I have confronted before. It honestly doesn’t have to be this way, but I guess I have a habit of chasing after people who find it easy to forget me. And in the end, I’m on the losing end. I’m trying my best not to think about it though. So, we’ll see…

Until next time,

PEACE OUT.

P.S: Here’s the documentary that Rojakrew worked on, if you are interested!

A Much-Needed Break

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So, what have I been up to as of late? Well, there were plenty of assignments to clear and an equal amount of changes to deal with. I’m not going to lie about how I questioned some friendships as they were put to the test over the stressful past few weeks.

And then I made myself sad one night when I just couldn’t fall asleep and decided to look through my photo gallery. I noticed how we have all changed. You know, from hairstyles to the people we surround ourselves with. I was afraid that the bond we all once had was no more. But I was comforted with the realization that the pressure and stress that we were under could be one of the reasons why it seems that way. We will probably return to the way we have always been when we are all carefree and happy again, right?

So yes, I had to look at the bigger picture and filter out the negativity which also reminded me that what I have left is something beautiful and amazing. And this was pretty clear by how everyone was able to get together on the day of our final submission for the semester and celebrate not only the end of the semester but also one of the birthdays. I would go on to give you details of how we spent the day but I’ll just leave you with this video instead.

Next, the holidays! I have been looking forward to the holidays forever. Not because I dread school but because I really just want a break. A break that I can spend staying at home, watching movies and TV shows all-day, read and write more blog posts. Plus, I also feel that I do deserve this break because of all the hard work I have been putting in. We all have, haven’t we? So, I definitely am happy that I another six weeks of holidays. But just like how the first week was burnt in school, finishing up the final assignment for the semester, it turns out that the holidays might not be as stay-home as I expected. There are some activities that require me to go back to school and others with friends and family that I am looking forward to but which still mean that I have lesser time for myself. Thereby, I’m hoping that once all these activities are over, that I am left with at least a week or two to do whatever I want to.

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This is exactly how I wish I can spend my holidays.

Speaking of activities I am looking forward to, there is a class chalet that I am excited about. We have a bigger chalet as compared to the last one we booked, this time last year. I feel like this is going to be just what everyone needs to bond and officially celebrate the end of the first semester. I’m also hoping that everyone can surrender their phones at the door but let’s get real, that is not going to happen. So, I’ll just deal with it. I’ll also be able to spend some time with my closest friends from secondary school again. And of course to be able to have a sleepover with my cousins (Let’s hope that I can get them to put their phones down though). There is also a stand-up comedy event that I’m looking forward to and I hope it goes well.

I guess, I do have quite a lot to look forward to over the next six weeks. And just as I was typing this I remembered how I would also be getting my grades and the timetable for the next semester in a couple of weeks. Oh well, we all need a balance of the good and the bad, right? Until next time…

PEACE OUT.