In My Head

852110236_13448670704630895532.jpgThe past three months have gone by pretty quickly and I love how it is already April. I did spend quite a lot of the time being in my head trying to figure things out. As much as I try to keep my sensitive and insecure moments to a minimum, sometimes I just cannot help myself.

But before I get to writing about those deeper moments – which are mostly in camp – I will start with the highlights from the weekends – when I am out of camp.

In February, I attended Jamie’s play, An Absolute Turkey and in March, Shaf’s play, The Illusionist. Now, I have told the both of them this – if our lives were a reality show, the ‘competition’ between the both of them over whose play is better would have been a driving force for drama the entire season. HAHA.

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Post-Show Happiness Pt. 1

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Post-Show Happiness Pt. 2

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Post-Show Happiness Pt. 3

But no, in all seriousness, it was fun supporting the both of them. I feel like they both stepped out of their comfort zones – in different ways – and it made me proud, sitting there in the audience, watching them and being there with a flower or candy bouquet after the show. I hope to see them in action again soon.

The All In! Young Writers’ Festival was held in March too. I only attended one screening of a few short films including, I Love You More, a short film that I was involved in producing as part of a group project for a filmmaking module over a year ago.

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Forgot to mention that they were both late.

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But it’s okay, I forgive ya’ll.

It was nice that this project brought me, Dalene and Minyi back together a year later. (The other group members, Rachel, Sherlyn and Chels couldn’t make it.) I held off from re-watching the short film leading up to the screening because I thought that seeing it again after a long time during the screening would make it more ‘special.’ After the screening, we had lunch where we gave each other life updates and rehashed certain things that happened back during our three years in Poly. We also did some window shopping so it was some simple fun.

Later in March, I also attended a secondary school reunion with Azfar, Rosydi and Gina. It was hosted at one of our schoolmate’s house. Although I really appreciated the invite, I was hesitant and reluctant to attend from the get go. Secondary school just does not bring back the best of memories for me – I did not really fit in and back then it was quite a struggle. So it was a last minute decision to attend.

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I think it has been close to two years since the four of us were last together?

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I hope not another two years go by before we’re together again. *Glares at Gina*

Rosydi and Azfar could totally see how nervous I was on the bus to the reunion. And honestly, I would not have attended the reunion if they were not attending with me. I think it was just the uncertainty as to who was going to be there and how they were going to act that made me nervous. I knew Gina would be there too and since she has not been the easiest person to meet up with, seeing her there – though she showed up two hours late – was an added bonus.

The three of them were able to interact with these people that we had not seen in forever pretty easily but for me, it was awkward. Of course there was the typical army talk with the guys but none of the girls I used to be close to were there. (I believe that the invitations did not reach everyone… Oops.)

I also feel like I have evolved from who I used to be back in secondary school and so these people who did not really know me on a deeper level back then – to begin with – did not have much to say to me and likewise I did not have much to say to most of them either. After all, I was quite the wallflower for a bulk of those four years.

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At least I won’t have to worry about FOMO now.

I cannot really say that I regret attending but at the same time, I cannot say I am glad I attended either.

And last night, I attended Fifth Harmony’s 7/27 Tour concert after buying the tickets way back in January. I was lucky that Khairul – a friend that I made during the two month Signals course after BMT – was willing to go with me.

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Gotta thank the concert buddy for groovin’ along.

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April may have only just started but this concert is most definitely a highlight. I found myself letting loose as I sang and danced my heart out. It was totally worth the wait and money and the girls were gorgeous! I felt really happy when Normani noticed and reciprocated my wave. If life was a reality show, attending this concert would have made for a perfect season finale.

In between all these key events, I think I have been doing an okay job at balancing my weekends with meet-ups and ‘me’ time. I think there was only one weekend where I contemplated between going out and staying home but I decided to go out anyway.

Life in camp has been generally alright. I tend to forget how lucky I am to have ended up in this camp and unit, in terms of workload and location. But finding my place and people, is still an issue.

A new batch of about 20 Signallers came in a month ago – a larger amount than expected. I took a genuine interest in getting to know most of them because we would have to decide who to keep with us after a two week ‘orientation’ programme – the rest would be posted out to different ‘departments’ within our unit. And since I would be working with whoever stays until next May when I leave, it was an important decision too.

We kept about a third of them. It was exciting having new people around. They were people who were easy to talk to and did work. But when you look at the big picture, the newbies did not exactly shake up the office dynamics like I had hoped.

For a start, I still feel like I lack a true confidante and ally in camp. You know, that one person that I can complain and vent to without worrying about what I said being repeated. And also the kind of person that I can make eye contact with and smile when something happens in the office because we both know that we are thinking the same thing.

I miss having that kind of connection with someone.

So I end up bottling things up in camp. Occasionally, I do let things slip because I can only hold so much in. But then I question if I should have said anything at all because I get asked if I have ‘anger issues’ or am told that I am ‘oversensitive.’

Do not get me wrong. I am still able to be myself in camp. I disturb and annoy almost everyone around me. And this is an indication that I have reached a certain level of comfort around these people. But there are different layers to every relationship and with these people, it is most definitely on the surface.

It doesn’t help that they do not really get me. I am a lot of things but these people know me best to be ‘annoying.’ I can own that but it does get exhausting when that seems to be the only word people associate you with – even if lightheartedly.

For now, there are only about two to three individuals in camp who I ‘trust.’ It being really easy to rub me the wrong way could be one reason for this low number. But I guess, there just is not that much in common to forge strong bonds over. And with everyone on their phones most of the time, there is barely any attempt at conversation to find common topics either.

Sure, they bond over playing the same mobile games. And so it would be a lot easier if I just downloaded this game and played along. But I told myself back in secondary school that I was not going to change just to fit in and I still want to keep that promise to myself. Call me stubborn or difficult but I am not going to do something that I would not normally do just to get by.

There are also other things that have happened or been said that got the wheels in my head turning. But at the end of the day, I know I can’t let what people think, say or do affect my spirit. It is just hard to remember at times especially when there is no one in your environment to remind you of that.

So I am going to try to care less and not add up the nothings into something. I know it is not going to be easy and I will probably be in my head again by the end of the week – after all, it does keep me occupied. But I will be working on it. Whatever happens, happens.

Fifth Harmony sang in their song, ‘Brave Honest Beautiful’:

“Don’t go and waste your precious time with all that nonsense on your mind.”

And this reminder is why I feel like the Fifth Harmony concert is a perfect finale.

Until next time,

PEACE OUT.

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The Dreaded Next Chapter Pt. 2

I’ve told you everything you need to know about my internship. And you already know about some of the post-internship decisions I had to make. So this post is more about the things that are going to happen – whether I like it or not – before the current chapter closes and the next one begins.

Picking up from where I left off, I started tearing when I read the date on my enlistment letter because I was feeling a mix of fear and sadness. I was afraid of the unknown. And I was also upset that I had just two months before everything changed for two whole years. I revealed the news to some friends and I also told my Dad about it. However, it was the chat I had with my older brother that night that gave me a renewed confidence that I will be just fine. My brother basically answered any question I had, based on his experience. He told me to break up the two years into smaller portions and that made me realise that for now, all I need to worry about is the first two weeks of confinement because after that, at least I should be able to head home every weekend – unless there’s a twist.

I’ve been trying to prepare myself mentally and physically but it hasn’t exactly been easy. I feel conflicted between spending the two months working out as opposed to lazing around while I can. So far, I would like to think I’ve been doing an alright job at balancing both. And I hope that keeping that up or doing better will make me feel more confident and comfortable in the days leading up to my enlistment.

I’ve always known that it’s not going to be easy and that’s why I’ve been dreading it. I mean I’ve never been the fittest and it’s going to be tough keeping my emotions in check. But I do look forward to seeing myself change for the better throughout the next two years. I just hope that I don’t lose what my friends call, a ‘killer’ smile in the process.

“I’m stronger than you think and tougher than I know.”

The next thing that is going to happen whether I like it or not is graduation. And before the graduation ceremony was the graduation show – DTVM Awards – which literally happened two days ago. It’s a tradition for every class to put up a performance at the DTVM Awards. In Year 1, my class put on a skit. In Year 2, we hosted a game. And now, in Year 3, we filmed a music video parody. Although, I was initially against the idea of filming a music video because of the amount of time and energy we would have to invest into it, I’m glad we ended up pulling through. Because looking back, it wasn’t just a music video that we created, it was memories too. I can’t wait for us to look back at both the music video and blooper reel in years to come and cry and laugh in equal measure.

“If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that’s a full day. That’s a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you’re going to have something special.”

– Jim Valvano

It was during the process of filming the music video that I started to wonder how anything else that is to come can possibly top the people I’ve met and the experiences I’ve had over the past three years. I’ve laughed, I’ve thought and I’ve cried over the past three years enough to feel complete. And I definitely feel like DTVM is something special that I will always have with me.

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The cast of the music video in our #Kidzania outfits. (Missing Shantel, Sam and Eunice)

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#ThugLife selfie.

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#Flannel selfie.

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#BusinessFormal selfie.

I was expecting to cry during the video montage of the past three years, at the DTVM Awards but it was taking a step back and looking at the bigger picture that got me emotional.

“And yes, I know we all love each other but the fact is the glue that holds high school friendships together is high school. Being around each other everyday, seeing each other in the halls, whenever something is up we don’t have to do any work to talk to our friends about it; they’re right there. As soon as it takes effort, we get lazy and then we forget and then we just move on. I don’t want to fade away.”

– Tina Cohen Chang (Glee)

The recycled quote above sums up my sentiments perfectly. Over the three years, we have all found our immediate circle of friends. And I’m sure we’ll all do a great job at keeping in touch with the people within that immediate circle. What saddens me is the thought that we won’t make the same effort to keep in touch with the people outside that circle who we still consider our friends.

I know we went six months without seeing each other everyday during our internships. And that little gathering we had in the middle for Christmas felt special, for that reason. And now every time we see each other, it doesn’t really feel like anything has changed other than time having passed by and us knowing that graduation is approaching. All I’m hoping for is that we try to keep the bond that we now share even if we get busy and even if it isn’t as convenient as it once used to be and even if we have new friends to fill that void.

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I want to walk down a real red carpet with these people.

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The #ILoveYouMore Team.

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The #WeAreTheMob Team.

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With Shaf, Chels and Jamie. (I hope the official photos turned out better.)

I want to be there in the future, to hear about the new TV show they’re developing or about the cover story of their magazine or about a event I can attend to show my support. I know it will take some time for all of us to get there given that we will have to spend three to four years in University or three to four years climbing up that hierarchy in this industry but I know we’ll get there.

I still have some time before my enlistment and I’m sure I’m bound to feel nervous the closer I get to it. There are a couple of tiny things I wish to accomplish before I enlist. I will try my best to use my time productively while still allocating time for lazing around and doing nothing. It’s going to be just fine. I’ll be just fine.

“The best use of imagination is creativity. The worst use of imagination is anxiety.”

– Deepak Chopra

Until next time,

PEACE OUT.

 

The Dreaded Next Chapter Pt. 1

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Since I last wrote a blog post, my internship ended, I contemplated extending my stay at my internship company, figured out university applications, received my National Service enlistment letter and participated in my final production as a DTVM student.

Let’s go in chronological order, starting with the end of my internship.

The last few weeks of my internship wasn’t any different than before. I still had transcriptions to complete and documents to scan for the main project I was attached to but the to-do list was getting shorter and shorter as my final week was approaching.

On days where I was not needed at the office, I was needed to help out on shoot for another project. I must say that I am glad I got the chance to work on both projects. It allowed me to compare certain aspects of TV production as the size of the crew and my job scope for each project was slightly different. But of course, on my final few days, the things I had to complete for both projects came to a head. There was so many things to settle and I thought back to what one of my friendly colleagues told me.

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A selfie taken after the shoot with friendly production crew members.

“People like us will never have an easy last day. We’re too responsible.”

I didn’t believe her at the time but it turned out to be true. I don’t mean to flatter myself but I have to give myself some credit for always providing a certain quality to the work that I am tasked with. So it took longer than expected but eventually I managed to complete everything.

With that being said, I have to thank the friendly colleagues who made my 22-week internship easier. They treated me like one of their own and made me feel so much more comfortable at work. During my final week, they treated me to a farewell meal and in return, I wrote them cards as my humble way of thanking them for everything. I owe them a lot more than just cards and I hope that I will be able to give back to them somehow, some way, in the future.

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Here are the friendly colleagues who made my time so much easier.

As cliche as it may sound, I definitely feel like I have grown from the internship experience . It was not easy having to adapt to the ‘real world.’ I even felt uncomfortable and uneasy at times. But like The Biggest Loser host, Bob Harper, said, “I think that growth happens when you are at your most uncomfortable.”

Now, before I could close this internship chapter for good, I was presented with an offer to prolong the chapter – at the very least – until the end of May. I considered the offer because the project was something I thought I would enjoy working on. I discussed it with family, friends and colleagues and ultimately chose to do what I felt was best for me – taking the break that I have earned.

I have been looking forward to this break forever and I would be sabotaging myself by committing to another three months of work with only a two week break in-between the end of my internship and the start of the new project.

I felt good about my decision for about 36 hours into my break until I noticed everyone around me either working or extending their internship or knowing exactly what their next step was going to be. It made me start looking for something too. I estimated my enlistment date to fall in August and that meant I would have at least a six-month break. I could see myself chilling at home for about two to three months but finding a job after that would leave me yet another small window to rest before enlisting. Eventually I just told myself to take a chill pill and surprisingly, this was one of the times I actually listened to myself. And I am so glad I did as it turns out I am not enlisting in August. (More on that later.)

Starting my internship two weeks earlier than everyone else meant I finished my internship two weeks earlier. I think these two weeks were crucial for me to figure out my university applications. One of my closest friends from secondary school, Azfar, has been urging me to think about it forever but I always put it off. Thereby, these two weeks came in handy for me to figure it out and actually complete the application process – which was pretty tedious. I ended up applying for NUS’s Faculty of Arts and Social Sciences (FASS) as well as NTU’s Communication Studies as my top choices.

I attended the NTU Open House hoping to be excited by the prospects of studying there (just like when I attended the SP Open House) but it turned out to be pretty dull. After sitting through three talks, I didn’t even want to attend the NUS Open House, the following weekend. As of right now, I am still leaning towards NTU but there is one important factor to consider and I’ll worry about it when the time comes. (Oh and thanks Azfar for helping me out when I was bugging you to help me check everything. I really appreciate it!)

Now, moving on to National Service. I was out with Chelsea and Shafna after watching Zootopia when I received a text from Rosydi about how he received his enlistment letter. When I found out that he was enlisting in May, the wheels in my head started turning. I couldn’t wait to return home to check my letter box, just so I could clear any anxiety I had about my enlistment. Ideally, I would open the letter box to nothing that was addressed to me but of course, when I checked my letter box, there it was.

I still had a little hope. My enlistment date could still be much later than May, right? So I dashed to my room and slowly opened the letter to find out I was enlisting on May 18 2016.

It wasn’t long before tears started streaming down my face.

(I’m ending this instalment of “The Dreaded Next Chapter” here because I’ve gone beyond 1000 words and this is Minutes with Aravind not Hours with Aravind. But I think I ended it at a pretty dramatic cliffhanger, eh?)

Until next time,

PEACE OUT.

Here’s What You Missed Pt. 1

These pictures didn't turn out good but they look good against that background so...

I’m here ready to recap the past month based on what I remember and what has been documented on my Twitter account. I would usually look at my photo gallery on my phone but I formatted my phone a few weeks ago and lost about a month worth of pictures and texts. I’ll tell you more about that later but let me bring you back to the last day of the first school term, 29th May.

29th of May was the day Dolph Ziggler, a professional wrestler from WWE was coming down to Singapore for a meet and greet and also to promote the WWE Live show in Singapore (which is one week away, on the 2nd of July and I’ve got my ticket already, by the way). However, the catch was that only the first 100 Starhub customers and a couple of other early birds (if I’m not wrong) would be able to meet and greet Ziggler. The rest of the people at the event would just watch as Ziggler answered questions and spoke to the audience for a bit.

I had been anticipating that day for quite some time, in hopes of being able to meet a WWE wrestler and crossing that off my long list of childhood dreams. Things were looking up given how my class that day was supposed to end at 12pm and the meet and greet was at 7pm. That meant that I had enough time to get there and queue up to be the first 100. BUT on the 29th of May, instead of the usual 9am-12pm class, we had a special out-of-class activity from 2-5pm. It was an Amazing Race bonding activity and on the way to School of the Arts (SOTA), the meeting place for the race, Angela who I was supposed to attend the meet and greet with was already in queue and she informed me that there were about 50 people in front of her. Add to that the fact that my teammate printing the group assignment due that day, was facing trouble with printing, I was pretty down. The printing problem got resolved soon enough but I still remained pretty bitter and upset about the meet and greet.

I put on my game face for the bonding activity but since it was not about speed but rather creativity, it was not as exciting and thrilling as it could have been. However, by the end of the activity, my group felt more bonded and so I guess that’s what mattered. After we were dismissed, I considered skipping the meet and greet because it would feel like a slap to the face seeing the lucky people go up on stage and meet Ziggler while I just stood there watching. However, since I had nothing else to do then and Hus was going regardless, I decided to just go ahead with the original plan.

5/7 of the team.

5/7 of the team. Jes was sick and Bernice was walking ahead.

5/7 of the team... Again. This time, Bernice left early for debate.

5/7 of the team… Again. This time, Bernice left early for debate.

The meet and greet was fun. Ziggler showed up late which I thought was strange but it was fun watching fans imitate Ziggler’s entrance (an ‘entrance’ is how a wrestler walks to the ring) as part of a competition of who does it best. Rishi and Nadiah joined us soon enough and we laughed at the contestants together. When it was time to for the meet and greet, the four of us just stood there watching and waiting for Angela to walk on stage. I must say that it was pretty entertaining watching Ziggler interact with his fans. He sure must have felt tired of signing all those pictures and having to put on a smile for every fan he met. It made me respect WWE Superstars and Divas a lot more though. Ziggler’s bodyguard was also pretty cool. Whenever Ziggler hugged a fan, he would have a really tiny smile. I guess he had to keep the fierce look to tell people to get off stage when they were taking too long. When Angela joined us, I was honestly pretty happy for her. The two of us, along with Girwina are attending the LIVE show next week together. So, hopefully that will be fun and somehow, someway, my dream will be fulfilled then. Once it was confirmed that the meet and greet would not open for more people to join, Rishi and I left.

This is the only picture I have access to after formatting my phone. And I only have it because Angela tagged me in it on Facebook... Sigh.

This is the only picture I have access to after formatting my phone. And I only have it because Angela tagged me in it on Facebook… Sigh.

Here's a stolen picture of Dolph Ziggler at the event.

Here’s a stolen picture of Dolph Ziggler at the event. (Credit: The Urban Wire)

Here's another stolen picture, just so you know what he looks like.

Here’s another stolen picture, just so you know what he looks like. (Credit: The Straits Times)

I thought I was going home but Rishi was meeting Jasper and Shan Yi. I decided to tag along since they didn’t mind. They were going around looking for dresses as part of work. It was fun searching for a particular type of dress with them. We ended the day at Coffee Bean where we had fries and drinks. Later, Jasper returned to work while the rest of us travelled home.

On to the next topic, the MPH book fair that I attended with Jamie, Chels and Shaf at Expo on the 5th of June. I’ve always loved book fairs because it’s nice to be surrounded by books. Sure, it makes me feel guilty by reminding me of all the books I have in my shelve, unread but it is still pretty fun anyway. I usually attended these book fairs with my parents so it was refreshing attending this one with the girls. I suggested the idea to them and they were on board. We walked around laughing at book titles and I’m sure we all had some book in mind that we were hoping to find. I was hoping to find any one of the two Andy Cohen books, the final book in the DRAMA! series or even Perks of being a wallflower since I loved the book but never owned a copy of it. But in the end, I walked out with two graphic novels and the third and final book in Lauren Conrad’s Fame Game series. I was glad that the girls each got at least one book too so it wasn’t a wasted trip.

After the book fair, we had dinner at Texas Chicken at Changi City Point. It was my first time trying Texas Chicken and it was pretty good. We waited forever for Shaf to come back with her food that the rest of us were trying really hard not to start eating first. The conversations we had were a good mix of funny and thought-provoking. At some points, I looked around wondering if anyone was listening because we were talking about really strange things. After sitting there for about an hour, we all left for home. I can’t wait for the next meal that we have together.

Thanks for being great company. <3

Thanks for being great company.

A day later, on the 6th of June, I met with Rosydi and Azfar. It was a Saturday and I love spending my weekends at home but since there was no school the next day, I didn’t really mind. Plus, Azfar is in NS now so he only has his weekends free and we need to fit his schedule if we were meeting up. The plan was to watch a movie and have dinner together. So, we watched Spy – a really entertaining movie – and had dinner at Pastamania. It was a pretty good day.

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A selfie at the usual spot at Somerset because of the perfect lighting.

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Notice how Azfar is bald?

Whenever I meet up with the dudes, I remember not to worry about drifting apart from the people who are important to me post-graduation in Poly. They remind me that if people care enough about each other, they would make time for each other and find a way to remain in each other’s lives no matter how busy and difficult life gets.

I think this is a good place to end the first instalment in the “Here’s What You Missed” chronicles. I would continue writing but this post is already pretty long and I have a whole lot more to write about. I have to fill you in on the school trip to Ipoh and everything that has happened since I came back. I’ll save that for tomorrow. Stay tuned!

PEACE OUT.

P.S: If you feel like there are lesser pictures in this post, you are right. If only I had not formatted my phone.

We’ll see…

keep-calm-and-we-ll-see-7

The first week of the third year of school has started. And I do have quite a bit to write about. But before I can get to that, I need to recap the last three weeks of the school holidays. It just feels better to go in chronological order. However, I might have forgotten certain mention-worthy bits because it has been a while. So, what you read might just be a condensed recap.

Most of the fourth week was burnt at the CASS Freshmen Orientation Camp. I was involved in the camp as part of the Day Programmes team. I was not really looking forward to it because I’m not a fan of camps in general. However, that is also the reason why I feel a sense of accomplishment whenever I go through these camps. It’s a step towards ‘going out of my comfort zone’.

The camp was fun and it turned out better than expected. It was nice meeting the freshmen and getting to know my schoolmates better too. Of course, it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows. It was tiring and some things didn’t work out like we had all hoped it would. For instance, my team had to improvise all our games because it rained on all three days. There were other interesting things that happened too. (Things that I rather not mention here but would love to share with you in person.) But I guess what is important is that, by the end of the camp, there was a strong and special bond that was formed amongst the members of the organising committee. And that’s just nice.

The rest of the week, I didn’t do much. I needed to catch up on my sleep and TV shows.

Here's my Day Progs team!  (From left to right: Q, Joel, Me, Jasmin & Elisa)

Here’s my Day Progs team! We all contributed something different to the team. Wouldn’t have had it any other way.

A selfie with our night walk makeup on.

A selfie with our night walk scarers makeup on.

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Part of the Organising Committee.

The highlights of the fifth week have to be going to Universal Studios Singapore with Rosydi & Azfar and cafe-hopping with Chelsea, Jamie & Shafna. Let me tell you about USS first.

A month or two ago, Azfar told Rosydi and I that if he does really well for his A’Level exams, he would treat us to something. Back then, we had quite a number of ideas but the idea that we all agreed on was USS. My point is that, Azfar scored well and kept his word and I got to go to USS for free!

Although it was my second time there, I was even more anxious than the first time. I have got a fear of heights and almost every single ride had some sort up and (out-of-nowhere) down motion. After the The Mummy ride, I thought I was done for the day. But we took a break and I am proud to say that I did not back out of any ride. Of course it was just perfect, that riding the Battlestar Galactica roller coasters were not an option because it was out of order. So, I didn’t have to worry about that.

A summary of our time at USS would be us trying out the many rides and walking around taking pictures. Later that day, we also watched Fast & Furious 7. The ending scene was still very emotional despite the spoilers on social media. I feel sad whenever I listen to ‘See You Again’ but it’s catchy and addictive.

It's Vin Diesel. When we took this picture, we had no intentions of watching #Fast7.

It’s Vin Diesel! When we took this picture, we had no intentions of watching #Fast7.

Similar to the caption above. Funny how we ended up watching it for real later that day.

Similar to the caption above. Funny how we ended up watching it for real later that day.

How can you not love this picture?

How can you not love this picture? 

Thanks Azfar for the treat and thanks guys for the fun time!

Thanks Azfar for the treat and thanks guys for the fun time!

Next, cafe-hopping! We planned this just the week before when we were cooking at Jamie’s. We visited just three cafes – ChoupinetteWheeler’s Yard and FATCAT Ice Cream Bar. I’m not going to do a food review because I only have three levels when it comes to judging food – Okay, Good and Great. Most things fall in the ‘Good’ category and I’m happy with that!

We also took many pictures of ourselves and the food we ate. To summarise, it was good food and great company.

The Waffles at FATCAT were great.

The Waffles at FATCAT were great.

FATCAT's Original Waffle topped with a scoop of Cookies & Cream Ice Cream.

FATCAT’s Original Waffle topped with a scoop of Cookies & Cream Ice Cream.

This Chocolate Fudge cake from Wheeler's Yard was okay.

This Chocolate Fudge cake from Wheeler’s Yard was okay.

Brunch at Choupinette was great.

Brunch at Choupinette was great.

I really love this picture. #Perfection.

I really love this picture. #Perfection.

Moving on to week six, it was the Freshmen Orientation Programme also known as the last event the current CASS Club was involved in for now. Unlike the Orientation Camp, the Orientation Programme was compulsory. The CASS Club didn’t have that much to do. We were only involved in the first two days.

I couldn’t make it on the first day because I had to attend a compulsory ‘Grooming and Dining Etiquette Workshop’ in school. It was one of the workshops from week one that got pushed back due to lack of sign ups. The workshop was okay. I did learn something but I don’t know if I will remember everything when it matters the most. On the bright side, me completing this workshop means that all the compulsory workshops are out of the way!

On the second day of the orientation, we helped out with the campus tour. I was stationed at the writers’ room. However, the seniors were using it to rehearse for an important pitch. So, I tried to keep the freshmen outside after the first few rounds. After the campus tour, the CASS Club Main Committee took a couple of pictures together and that was that.

We had a checkered/flannel dress code.

We had a checkered/flannel dress code.

Thanks for the fun and not-so-fun times! I would do it all over again.

Thanks for the fun and not-so-fun times guys! I would do it all over again.

I was hoping to spend the rest of the week at home but on Wednesday and Friday, I went to school for Rojakrew meetings. The Rojakrew comprises of a few seniors, Chelsea, Jamie & Shafna. We have been working on a documentary the entire holiday and we officially released (or uploaded it on Facebook) on that Friday. In between the Rojakrew meetings, on Thursday, I spent the day in JB with Rosydi & Azfar. It was nice being away from social media.

After we uploaded the video, we just hung out at Hilltop Haven.

After we uploaded the video, we just hung out at Hilltop Haven. Here is half of Rojakrew! 

We played Monopoly Deal ( which has got to be one of my favourite card games ever!). I won just once.

We played Monopoly Deal ( which has got to be one of my favourite card games ever!). I won just once.

Later, we met Kirt for Dinner.

Later, we met Kirt for Dinner. She is now one of us!

I must say, it was a pretty nice way to end the holidays.

Now, four days of school have passed and I do have a couple of things on my mind. A couple of things I wish I could get off my chest. Things I have blogged about before. Things I have confronted before. It honestly doesn’t have to be this way, but I guess I have a habit of chasing after people who find it easy to forget me. And in the end, I’m on the losing end. I’m trying my best not to think about it though. So, we’ll see…

Until next time,

PEACE OUT.

P.S: Here’s the documentary that Rojakrew worked on, if you are interested!

Checkpoint

Another pretty picture.

I’ve been on holiday for three weeks and I’m left with three more. As something like a checkpoint, I decided to return to write another blog post, right before March ends and also right before I head off for a camp. Can you believe that a quarter of 2015 is nearly over?

The past couple of weeks have been really packed with activities and I don’t know how to feel about that. Part of me feels happy that I have things going on but the other part of me just wants to laze at home, binge-watching TV shows and movies.

The first week of the holidays was pretty dull. I had two compulsory workshops, three days straight. I didn’t really enjoy the workshops but I’m glad they’re over. I’m not saying that the workshop didn’t help me but I think that the main take-away from the workshop for me, was to practice and so the rest of it felt a little redundant. On the first day of the workshop, when the instructor was waiting for everyone to settle down, I felt so out of place because everybody around me was sitting with their friends and there I was sitting alone. But a few minutes later, Viena walked in and I felt ‘saved’. It was nice and comforting having a familiar face around.

Wouldn't have survived without Viena... Really!

Really wouldn’t have survived without Viena.

Later that week, I also met up with Shaf, Jamie and Chels for some dessert at Coldstone Creamery and some window shopping around town too. It was nice reflecting on the past school year and speculating what’s to come.

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It had been so long since I last had Coldstone! I also needed a reward for getting through the rough semester.

Do you like my hat?

Do you like my hat?

The place where this picture was taken has great lighting, doesn't it?

The place where this picture was taken has great lighting, doesn’t it?

Do you like our caps?

Do you like our caps?

The second week I had to go down to school one day to attend to some CASS Club matters. I had to collate all the paper work that I had done as the secretary and hand it up. It wasn’t too much work since I already had everything neatly organised on my laptop. The club president, Raf, helped me print everything and so I didn’t have that much work left to do.

Raf said that I look good here. Hmmm...

Raf said that I look good here. Hmmm…

I initially thought Raf was taking a selfie with her phone but I realised she was using my phone.

I initially thought Raf was taking the selfie with her phone but I soon realised she was using my phone.

Two days later, I attended the taping of the Asia’s Got Talent semi-finals. Before the taping, I met up with Chels for lunch. The plan was to use Google maps to locate a Pastamania near Suntec City (near Temasek Boulevard, to be exact) but in the end we couldn’t find it. So, we settled for The Manhattan Fish Market. During the taping, we unfortunately couldn’t take any pictures. The talents were entertaining and the judges were great too. It was a fun experience and definitely a step-up from the other game show tapings that I had attended.

The next day, I met up with Sydi and Azfar in town cause they had some shopping to do. I actually found a denim shirt that fit me perfectly at H&M (and it was on sale too!). But I realised that it didn’t go with any of the bottoms that I owned so… I had to pass on it.

I was twirling in this capey-hoodie-coat thingy.

I was twirling in this capey-hoodie-coat thingy.

Oh, here's a rare picture where they aren't making silly faces.

Oh, here’s a rare picture where they aren’t making silly faces.

And finally on Friday, it was the DTVM Awards which is the graduation show for my course, Creative Writing for TV & New Media (DTVM). The previous week when I met up with the girls, I was asking them for opinions on my outfit options. I really didn’t want to buy anything new for the event so it was just a lot of mixing and matching what i already owned. After dozens of combinations, I sent them two options and they all agreed on one outfit so I didn’t worry too much about what I was going to wear after that.

Here's the chosen outfit... I love this picture!

Here’s the chosen outfit… I love this picture!

The event went well as far as I’m concerned. The performance my class put up – which was actually just a simple game of charades – went smoothly. I will admit that because there were so many things going on around me and in my head, I was a little stressed out from thinking too much. But by the end of the night, it was just sad that the night marked the end of the seniors’ journey in DTVM. I’m so glad I actually got to know the seniors. They are friendly and talented and supportive. I was not exaggerating when I tweeted that I believe they have bigger and better things coming their way. And of course, the night also reminded me that I only have a year left with my classmates and so I do want to make the most of it.

DTVM Year 2 01 <3

DTVM Year 2 01 ❤

My busy week didn’t end there though. I met up with An, Shaf and Jamie on Saturday to bake scones! It was an interesting experience to say the least. We also watched Birdman which was not my cup of tea, at all. When Jamie described the premise in her movie review, I was really interested in watching the movie. But although the movie was shot by talented cameramen in a very creative way, I didn’t really appreciate the creativity. I just wanted to watch a ‘normal’ movie, if that makes sense?

They look good, don't they?

They look good, don’t they?

As you can see, while they were busy working, I was busy taking pictures.

As you can see, while they were busy working, I was busy taking pictures.

Jamie hard at work.

Jamie hard at work.

A very 'artistic' shot taken by Jamie.

A very ‘artistic’ shot taken by Jamie.

The third week has been another busy week. I had some freshmen orientation camp stuff to attend to on Monday and Wednesday. I expected a lot of chaos but it turned out pretty fun which is also how I think the actual camp would turn out. It’s all about who you surround yourself with, I believe.

I got to dress up in this 'god' outfit for the filming of a teaser. I love this picture!

I got to dress up in this outfit for the filming of a teaser for the camp. I love this picture!

On Thursday, I met up with the girls again but this time, to cook. We had done this ‘cooking’ thing before so I was pretty confident it will turn out good. I don’t even know the name of what we made but what I do know is that it tasted good. I preferred what we made the previous time though. Anyway, we caught a bit of the new cycle of Asia’s Next Top Model on TV while we were eating. We all agreed it was missing something. The show was pretty dull. Later, we watched a bit of Dance Moms before switching off the TV to just talk. Let me just say that, yes, I was surprised that we watched parts of two reality shows in one day. Who would have thought, right? Now, if only we could marathon entire episodes of some other reality shows I watched but I know, I know, I won’t get my hopes up. (I can already picture Chels rolling her eyes as she reads this) In the late evening, we left Jamie’s place and headed home.

Believe it or not, this was just the first part of our meals.

Believe it or not, this was just the first part of our meals.

On Friday, I headed to school to meet Azfar and Sydi. We like to make use of school facilities such as the board games and game consoles at the library and the bowling alley when no one else does. It was honestly so much fun playing Cluedo. We played a couple of rounds and with the exception of the first round (which I won because Azfar revealed something after he lost), we all made the wrong accusation and died in the other rounds. It was also pretty cool dancing terribly to songs on Dance Central. The best part is that I didn’t have to worry about them recording my terrible dancing too. After that we headed to the bowling alley and I did not suck that badly this time. Sydi still won though. We wrapped up the night with dinner at Burger Up, dessert at McDonald’s and a couple of games at Timezone. It was a great day overall. I still feel like playing Cluedo now.

We played Fifa for a while. I tried really hard to get a red card when it was my turn and I did.

We played Fifa for a while. I tried really hard to get a red card when it was my turn and I did.

I can't wait to play this game again.

I can’t wait to play this game again.

Another rare picture of them not making silly faces!

Another rare picture of them not making silly faces!

Three weeks have gone by and I’m left with another three. The first remaining week of my holidays will be burnt by the Freshmen Orientation Camp that I’m involved in. Like I mentioned at the start of this post, it starts tomorrow and I will actually be heading out tomorrow morning. I’m hoping that I will be able to worry less and have fun more. I’ll give an update when I get back, hopefully!

Until then,

PEACE OUT.

Bringing the Zen

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It feels like it’s been an extremely long time since I last wrote a blog post. (My last post was actually only about a month ago.) It only seems right for me to post something while I can instead of procrastinating so where do I begin?

I know that the week that we returned to a new school term was pretty eventful. Firstly, my classmates and I exchanged Secret Santa gifts. I was pretty pleased with what I got for Vera – a plant. Well it wasn’t a plant yet but it was a pot with the seeds that required watering. You know, one of those DIY-ish things. I wonder what the plant looks like now, almost a month later. Anyway, I didn’t attempt to figure out who my Secret Santa was although I knew who 4-5 other people were buying gifts for. I really didn’t want to ruin the surprise for myself though. And trust me, when I opened my gift, I was pleasantly surprised. It was a Hulk Hogan Pop! Vinyl figure! (For those who may not know who Hulk Hogan is, he is a WWE Legend. And a Pop! Vinyl figure is basically a cute version of a WWE action figure.) In addition to the figure, I also got a couple of superhero badges.

WWE Hulk Hogan Pop! Vinyl Figure

WWE Hulk Hogan Pop! Vinyl Figure

Love these badges. I promise to use them as soon as I get a new bag.

Love these badges. I promise to use them as soon as I get a new bag.

I really was not expecting anything WWE related and so it took me a while to figure out who my Secret Santa was. In fact, I actually couldn’t figure it out. So, I decided to just see Vera’s reaction to what I got her and I heard her saying something along the lines of, “I want to know who got me my gift so that I can show them what it looks like after it grows!” So, that was when I revealed that it was me who got her the plant and Vera in turn revealed that she got me my gift. #MysterySolved. It was a fun experience and it was nice to carry the Christmas spirit into our classroom even after Christmas was over. Thanks a lot Vera for the awesome gifts!

That same day was also when I had to help out at the SP Open House with course counselling. I was nervous at first but I got used to it. I got to share my experiences and meet some seniors. By the end of my session, I also returned home with two polaroids (courtesy of Bernice) that I added to my vision board. But I didn’t return home straightaway. Chels and I got Starbucks on the way back and I also collected my replacement Pebble watch from the post office. My Pebble’s screen had died about a couple of months ago and I just decided to email Pebble support to see if I can get it replaced and they sent me a replacement. Honestly, that day made me feel so appreciative for everything I had. I was just really happy and thankful. It was just a really memorable day.

However, as well all know if you have the ups, you must have the downs as well. And the new term meant the beginning of two big downs. Both of which were brought up in the first week.

Firstly, the documentary assignment which has been taking a toll on everyone. Having to find a profile who is interesting and willing to be filmed is one thing. Thinking of what sequences to film and the theme of the documentary is another. And having to actually film it is a whole other thing. I’m just trying to not go crazy and trying to bring the zen instead. I have faith in my team and I like the direction we are going in so far. Not everything has gone as planned and not everything has been going smoothly but that doesn’t mean that it all won’t work out in the end, right? (I just realised that I don’t have a picture with my team yet)

Secondly, the preparation for the Freshmen Orientation Camp. I’m just not a huge fan of camps in general and so I have anxiety just thinking about attending it. Plus, all the preparation just adds a certain amount of stress on top of all the assignments that we already have to work on. I also wonder if the camp is going to burn a valuable week of my holidays. I guess all I can do is just hope that I don’t regret my choice of signing up for it once the camp is over. I really don’t want to give up and pull out now.

There was another big down the second week back at school. I fell sick on a Wednesday and I felt terrible on Thursday and on Friday, I didn’t go to school. I didn’t want to get out of bed and I needed a day-off too. But the deadline for a photojournalism assignment was coming right up and I still had no pictures yet. I know it’s my fault for not starting earlier, so I decided to go all out on Saturday while still feeling sick. I got everything I needed though so I was able to put everything together in time. I just want to say thanks to the friends that checked in on me over those few days and were able to help me in one way or another. I am really thankful for you guys.

I’ve been trying hard to remind myself and everyone around me that it’s JUST another eight more assignments we have to complete. We’ve already completed 12 this semester so what’s another eight?

I’ll admit that I have been finding myself in these extremely stressful and frustrating situations. I would love to throw some shade right here but it’s just not the right time. I am pretty proud of myself for keeping cool and calm. But don’t get me wrong, I could potentially explode at any time. But this post and title is in reference to my current state of mind which I hope lasts for a long time.

So until next time,

PEACE OUT.

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